Pope Francis was seen entering the sublevels of the Whitehouse, alongside the Antichrist Obama, Hillary Clinton, Joe Biden, and the soon-to-be socialist overlord, Bernie Sanders. The group met behind locked doors with several new Initiates into the Democratic party at approximately 10pm, a confidential source confirms. A sort of guttural chanting was heard shortly afterwards, peaking in volume as the moon was fully engulfed in the earth’s umbral shadow. Though a total of eleven people were seen entering the meeting room, only ten left. Our informant was nearly caught by Secret Service agents while attempting to enter the room afterwards, but they noticed a strong smell of perfumes wafting from the door before making their escape.
A number of decent, hardworking Christians contacted my office with reports of “feeling slightly gay” as the moon turned red. Red, the color of the Devil. Clearly the work of the Antichrist Obama, and the Pope who feeds him the powers of innocent, God-fearing folk. They conspire to turn us all into raging homo-gays, using the powers of the celestial bodies that the LORD himself made.
Take heed, America. The End Times are on the horizon, and the Liberals seek to topple our pillars of morality before Judgement Day. I will pray for us all tonight.
Bobby Coachella is a managing editor and reporter for Liberal Darkness.