President Trump Blinded By Eclipse Glasses

Following the spectacle that was the Great American Eclipse this afternoon, word is now getting out that the President of the United States has suffered a “catastrophic loss” of his vision. According to White House insiders, Donald Trump was overheard scoffing at allegations of intentional sabotage in many shipments of...

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president trump strike north korea fire fury power of homosexual chemtrails

Confirmed: President Trump Vows to Strike North Korea with Fire and Fury of Homosexual Chemtrails

During a televised statement, President Trump announced that North Korea will be struck with unprecedented ‘fire and fury’ the likes of which the world has never seen, the devastating power of said strikes destroying North Korea forever. Insiders with knowledge of the White House confirm that the strikes will not...

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U.S. President Barack Obama takes a drink of water as he listens to a question following his remarks at the American Society of News Editors (ASNE) Convention in Washington, April 3, 2012. REUTERS/Jason Reed

Confirmed: With Only Hours Left of His Dark Rule, Obama Has Failed to Destroy Jesus and Reign In A New Age of Liberal Darkness

For the past eight years, Obama has stood accused of the following:  being a Kenyan national who uses Ebola to torment the Christian masses, using homosexual chemtrails to turn straight men gay, stealing our guns, turning the Large Hadron Collider to the heavens themselves so he may wage war against...

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Trump Orders New EPA To Use HAARP Weather Machine To Topple Giant Sequoia Tunnel Tree in California

Angered by California’s liberal-bent in the face of his presidency, President-elect Donald Trump made a show of his presidential power by ordering the EPA to turn HAARP weather machine “upon the loser left wing treehuggers” of California. Ever year, thousands of Democratic environmental activists are known to go visit and...

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Hillary Clinton And Barack Obama Send Michael J Fox Back In Time To Fix Clusterfuck In The Space Time Continuum That Has Somehow Resulted In Donald Trump

With no other rational explanation as to how the United States of America has given Donald Trump so many votes to become president, Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton are sending Michael J Fox back in time in a Delorean to see what the hell happened. There can be no other...

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