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ALERT: Gays Invent Photon-Bending Solar Eclipse Glasses To Convert Straight Men Into Homosexuality

Gays have pooled their vast resources and mastery of physics to unleash a plan that will convert many straight-family men into into homosexuality during the August, 21st solar eclipse. The Christian Defense League of Texas reports that gays have found a way to harness light energy to cause homosexuality to infect a person at the rate of 3 * 10^8 m/s. This means that before a man can even tell homosexuality is taking hold as he views the eclipse and tries to glance away, it will already be too late.

[adinserter block=”1″]Researchers report that in closed-studies, men who view the sun through the glasses report ‘feeling energized and yearning for foreign DNA’. Moles within the gay community reveal that gay scientists have found a way to use plane-polarized light to alter the unique light only visible during a complete solar eclipse.

[adinserter block=”3″]Those in the direct path of the eclipse will be hardest hit.  The CDC estimates that the conversion rate of those wearing the gay-created eclipse glasses will be 99% and the intense light will burn homosexuality right into the brain via the eye’s retina.  Once straight men will immediately rip off their glasses and likely thrash about, the intense surge of gay hormones causing them to wildly buck their heads around and go into a primal rage, their heightened senses of sight and smell keyed in on the hulking attributes of other men.

The CDL of Texas is warning straight people to make sure their solar eclipse glasses are NASA approved and do not give an internal band in ROYGBIV configuration, a known display pattern that gays have exploited to trigger photonic homosexuality in the brain.  The buddy-system is encouraged and solar eclipse viewing parties are being warned to manually inspect glasses and to have ‘containment areas’ to control any men who acquire homosexuality via the newest scientific advancement of the gay agenda.

gay solar eclipse glasses aug 21st


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