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Beware the Bromosexual: Gays Using Friendship To Groom Straight Men Into the Homosexual Lifestyle

New census data from the CDC confirm that the rate of per capita homosexuality has increased from 2% to 5% over the course of the last year.  Such a drastic increase in domestic homosexuality warranted intense investigation and the findings are that gays have invented a new way to not only groom, but fully convert straight men to the homosexual lifestyle.

Sassy commentary about the passerby, short shorts and sweaty cream thighs quivering after a jog in the vineyard. Bromosexual relationships are springing up between genetic gay and straight men all across the country, and it is slowly leading to hetero men leaving their wives and families behind to indulge in a lifestyle befitting Bachus himself.

As America now has legalized gay marriage, like never before gays boldly announce their orientation and share their weddings and lifestyle on Facebook.  Unsuspecting straight men are suddenly finding out that their coworkers or gym buddies are gay and living the lavish homosexual lifestyle:  fast cars, fancy restaurants, exotic vacations, no kids or nagging wife, and all-night benders without consequence come Monday.

Genetic gay men are naturally astute and crafty, and have no greater hunger than to convert a straight man and make him yearn for foreign DNA in his busom.  It is this dangerous combination that has allowed gays to embrace their straight friends into a ‘bromosexual’ relationship where they let their typically overworked and stressed straight friends along on their vivacious lifestyles.

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Social psychologists report that after finding out their cohorts are gay, straight men typically are very accepting and even become envious of the high profile lifestyles that is typical to the homosexual community.  This creates the perfect conditions for conversion.

Gays Are Causing Hetero Men To Fall Into a Straight-Life Crisis

Since gay marriage was legalized in 2016, America’s hetero-divorce rate has soared to near 60%.  Their is correlative evidence that proves for every 1 gay marriage, there are 16 straight divorces.

The cause of divorce is typically the same:  straight men complain about long work hours without truly ‘getting ahead’ financially, tired wives or girlfriends who lose interest in intimacy and become more demanding about domestic affairs.  Kids run rampant through the house, disconnected from the family on their Smartphones and the dog shits the carpet.[adinserter block=”3″]

Straight men are fed up and then see a gleaming lifestyle on the hill.  Genetically gay men tend to have very fit, firm bodies, which are only fueled into further taut muscle perfection from all the lurid, heart-racing concoctions taken at all night rave benders during the weekend.  Married gay men tend to have double-male income homes, giving them more money, and tend to not have kids, giving them more time.  Combine this with the more laissez-faire attitude toward promiscuity and indulging one’s impulses, then it is easy to see how straight men are being brainwashed, groomed, befriended and then bedazzled into the gay lifestyle.


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