Growing frustrated with Obama’s inaction in Syria, Vladimir Putin fired up a jet late last night and flew into Syria where he flew 25 sorties, destroying 8 ISIS facilities before completing his last run.
Sources reveal that Putin flew for 24-hours straight, completing mission after mission that UN generals allegedly pleaded for Obama to carry out.
Eyewitnesses confirm that during one mission, Putin’s plane was hit by a flak cannon as he laid into a strafing run. Putin had apparently gone off-script and with his bare eyes noticed that an ISIS tank was closing in on a Syrian village that had numerous school children.
With his radar down and plane leaking fuel, Putin dramatically flew over the enemy tank in such a way that his leaking jet fuel spilled onto it. Putin then circled back around and opened fire upon the tank, causing it to explode in a massive ball of destruction.
Using coded radio guidance, Putin found his way to the last enemy command center and unleashed the rest of his arsenal upon it, leaving nothing but rubble behind. After returning back to base, Putin climbed from the cockpit of his Su-25 and straightened out his suit jacket as media attempted to ask him questions about his unprecedented mission. The Kremlin reports Putin plans to resume his schedule and will meet with an animal rescue charity later in the day.
The White House could not be reached for comment at time of report.