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NASA: Obama Using Mars Water To Give Himself Satanic Power

Barack Obama drinks ancient Mars water to give himself the power of the Egyptian gods.

U.S. President Barack Obama takes a drink of water as he listens to a question following his remarks at the American Society of News Editors (ASNE) Convention in Washington, April 3, 2012. REUTERS/Jason Reed

Obama talks another sip of Martian water to give himself the same powers possessed by the ancient false gods of Egypt.

Obama is using the water of Mars to give himself powers beyond that of normal men.

According to ancient Roman texts, Mars was the god of war.  Christian scholars hypothesize that Mars was actually a fallen angel who hid-out on the planet Mars (hence its name) after Satan and his liberal angels tried to fight God and were thrown out of heaven.

Mars went on to sneak to Earth where he tried to quietly rule the ancient world under many different names, including

[adinserter block=”1″]For a year Obama has diverted a staggering $64 billion of America’s budget to power NASA.  Why Obama would give such a crippling amount of America’s waning budget to NASA proved puzzling for months, but with NASA’s latest announcement and insider reports we can confirm Obama is exploring Mars so he may capture its secrets to give himself power to create a new age of liberal darkness for all mankind.

Weeks ago, the Curiosity rover revealed an ancient Egyptian hieroglypic set on Mars and the text, according to ancient Egyptologists, roughly translates to ‘O-BAMA’.  The bigger story is the US government’s shadow government budget that funded ‘return orbiters’ that are bringing Martian water straight back to the White House, where Obama is drinking it and seeing if it gives him the power of a fallen angel of war.

 

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Comments(13)

  1. Reply
    Jeannine says

    So that’s his secret. I wondered how he could be so much smarter and classier than all the bigoted ignorant right wing fundamentalist republicans.

    • Reply
      Joe says

      You sound like a retarded lemming sheeptard Jeannine.

      • Reply
        Mike says

        And you sound like a true conservative hero, Joe! You need to repost this so all true american patriots will know his secret!

        • Reply
          CantStumpDaTrump says

          Silly liberal Jeannine wants to destroy what us of the GOP worked hard for, by legalizing abortion so she can kill our conservative offspring and destroy America.

  2. Reply
    jeannedoak says

    Only a stupid idiot would believe this crap

    • Reply
      HerpDerp says

      That’s why they’re called “Republitard’s”…

      • Reply
        Nyope says

        Yeah, no they’re not. But liberals ARE called “libtards”. Nice try, though. Wait… no it wasn’t.

  3. Reply
    cynthia estrada says

    I believe that if we diverted all american, russian, chinese and european military funds into space exploration and its accompanying technology, it would be a good thing.

  4. Reply
    James joyce says

    Hitler’s minister of Propaganda said that if you tell a lie often enough, people will believe it is the truth. This ridiculous article was perhaps meant in jest, but weak American minds might believe this shit. We need to lift the expectations of our National Legislators and demand that they resolve differences. That’s good Politics.

  5. Reply
    Mary says

    What kind of idiot stick wrote this? I sure hope it was meant to be funny because it gave me a good laugh. If it wasn’t meant to be funny, then you need to get yourself help.

  6. Reply
    Alex says

    “Why Obama would give such a crippling amount of America’s waning budget to NASA proved puzzling for months”

    NASA receive less than 1% of America’s GDP. Therefore, it can’t really be defined as a crippling amount

    • Reply
      Kahkwa says

      If you did the research on this Alex, thanks.

  7. Reply
    James says

    ….it’s a joke. C’mon guys.

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